alas

i've got a so called "new" computer for my graphics work.. kinda happy but yet after 3 days.. its not done... why? there seem to be some error with the old motherboard i am using.. theres some conflict of drivers or something.. wasting my time man ! up to now i still dunno wats wrong.. :( considering i am good at repairing computers.. yet this is one of the most problematic computer i have met...

but wat to do.. dun have the cash to buy a new motherboard and cpu and ram.. have to just make do with more ram, and a new dvd writer and new 19" screen which totally rox ! its damm huge lah.. lolz.. very happy with that..

so my AMD cpu and motherboard with stanley oh from my air base gave me.. couldnt work :( still using my old dell 667mhz pentium3 computer which is turning yellow btw but still works like a charm.. its pretty good stuff i would say.. considering my computer is on 24hrs..

so now i am installing windows XP on the cpu and motherboard sanjay gave me.. sigh.. i dun even know how fast is the cpu.. if it lags too much for any graphics work.. i might really have to get a new cpu and motherboard and ram.. which means at least $500-$600 :( sigh.... prays its fast enough for some work....

well this has been ermm.. the worst 2-3 months of my whole damm life lah... nothing seems to be going on track.. in terms of :
1) work- i hate my colleauge -_-\\\
2) biz- it has been really slow pace-very tiring doing it alone
3) bike- i lost track of how much i spent on it.. speechless
4) love- the one i love aint in love with me, the wrong people fell for me -_-

thats enough shit for 2-3 months i guess !

i need a holiday really badly man.. ! anywhere is good.. just get me out of this shit for awhile....

Durian gloves

they just bring back fond memories.. why something so simple is so meaningful and able to activate certain emotions in me..

The first time using them was during poly days.. my CCA, The Adventure Seekers... we had to do pioneering... which is to built those huge structure for NP open house and where sec school students and visitors are able to try the elements we built.. wearing those DURIAN GLOVES to tie knots and lashings... it was tears, sweat, blood.. and many more... its tough but yet really fun.. TASIC.. the best thing that happend to me in my poly life..

Yet another time DURIAN GLOVES were used was during my YEP project to vietnam.. we had to build a class room for the village peeps.. and yes its hard work again.. thats one of the best trip i had... i love to travel.. not in luxury.. but backpack style.. somehow u get to see alot of things in a different light.. people are not so fake.. and gives u good service cos u paid a leg or arm for it... u eat like the locals do.. u pay the same price.. no special clean plates or special chairs.. nothing.. i like that.. :)

Third time i remembered using these DURIAN GLOVES is during my bike lessons at bbdc.... its cos i crash my car so i wanted a trasport badly.. so thats why i took a bike license.. now i love biking to the core.. i used to think its damm dangerous( i still do agree its dangerous) and its like when i drove.. i dun give a damm to bikers.. i squeeze them to the sides.. and i feel powerful.. with the metal protection i had.. it was den after taking my bike license that made me realise... they are humans too.. they have a right to be on the road. and such.. so yeah i am a safe driver and biker now.. but who knows wat will happend the next time i am biking... theres always this big question mark when u ask a biker who is single..

If your half body paralyse, who will take care of u ? its either they choose not to think of that question to deny the fear or the emptiness that they have.. perhaps thats why bikers tend to look for bikers as a partner(jiahui now u know why sooooo many guys are after u ah? :P ahboy, WHAHA).. somehow they will understand this deep fear and passion.. i guess this is the thin line btw life and death btw bikers that makes bikers closer den compared to car drivers.. well its an unspoken bond which seems to appear from god knows where.. no one has an explanation nor reason for such feelings..

well well heres the end of the durian gloves story of mine..

Just Time

Is time a factor?

Or just a chapter

Looking at the weather

Wiliting like a flower

That burning desire

Just like my fire

In dire

.

Just a lil poetry written about how i feel.. and it somehow looks like a heart.. aww.. well~

gab